How to release the I am not good enough mindset
There is no hiding that we all have felt not enough at some point. It is such an ugly, stressful, unmotivating negative core belief that most people carry within and is one of our deepest collective wounds that need healing.
I am not good enough is connected to your solar plexus chakra
I am not enough is connected to the Solar Plexus chakra. This chakra is an important center that symbolizes your relationship with self, stamina, inner strength, and self-esteem and is all about the energies of fire. This is THE inner fire that only you can repress or kindle.
I usually see more ashes than inner fire when I work on my clients’ Solar Plexus chakras during my coaching & healing sessions. When the feeling of not enough is present, it comes to the surface in statements such as:
I cannot do it.
I will never reach my goal.
I don’t have what it takes.
I cannot fulfill those expectations.
I am not (pretty, good, fun, smart, etc) enough for…
It is often deep within you as your unconscious core belief, and it is not easy to recognize immediately. So instead, you show it in how you talk to yourselves and others and through your actions.
I am not good enough is learned experience from childhood and connected to scarcity attitude
This mindset is connected to scarcity and learned belief. When you feel not enough, you either:
1. Have set too high expectations and goals.
2. You feel you cannot fulfill other’s high expectations.
When you drop into this mindset you never have enough of anything and are rarely satisfied with anything or anyone. Your negative self-talk kicks in and you start to behave from negative perspective. For example, you feel you need to do more, you push yourself to reach way too far and so you become self-sacrificing, forgetting your own needs and pleasing others. You do too many things at once and get nothing done or you over do things. You constantly compare yourself to others. And the worst, you give up on things way too early as you feel the expectations (of yours or others) are way too high. You give up on reaching your dreams.
Often you will not know where you picked up and learned this belief. Do you recall a situation in your childhood when you started feeling not enough as you were searching for your parents attention? If not, it doesn’t matter. But you have felt it many times, especially in situations when you did not get something you wanted, such as the perfect job or relationship, when someone else was “better, more beautiful or smarter” than you, or when your dream seemed too far away.
REMEMBER THAT IN ALL THOSE CASES, IT WAS NEVER ABOUT NOT BEING GOOD ENOUGH
That perfect job was not your path. Trust me. Something better is coming up.
That relationship you wanted but did not work out? It shows that you need to focus on yourself and the abundant world. You allow others to step over you and feel like they have taken something from you.
What about that “better” person? Did you try as hard as (s)he did? Did that person take away something from you?
What about your dream? You easily compare yourself with successful people. But you forget that they did not jump there from where you are now. They took baby steps to get there. So follow your intuition and take those baby steps instead.
Because…
YES, you can start the fire within.
YES, you will.
YES, you have what it takes.
YES, you can let go of I am not good enough mindset
YES, you can let your inner fire burn!
So HOW TO TRANSFORM THIS MINDSET?
1. Be conscious of your self-talk and how you behave. Notice when you drop into I am not good enough mindset. Once you notice, then simply pause for a sec and learn from that moment.
2. Know your needs and boundaries and communicate them as clearly as possible to others.
3. Set expectations that are reachable and create a plan on how to reach them.
4. Learn to communicate with others about everyone’s honest expectations. Remember: expect nothing and appreciate everything. It is your ego that needs expectations. Your soul does not expect anything.
5. Focus on an abundant world. The world is limitless!
6. Remember that it is not meant to be when something does not happen the way you want. Because it is not what your soul needs. A better fit is on its way.
7. Know that your self-talk are the biggest obstacles to reaching your dreams. Start healing your negative core beliefs with this framework.
8. Do inner child work to heal the roots of this belief.
9. Boost your Solar Plexus & inner fire by bringing your hands on your belly and imagining lighting the fire within. Meditate with it and see it spinning within you in a clockwise direction.
Practice yoga poses that open Solar Plexus, such as Warrior 1, 2, or 3, Plank pose, or Bow pose.
10. Work with a spiritual coach to transform this mindset.
I would love to see a world where everyones’ inner fires would burn 24/7. Imagine what this Planet Earth would look like if we all lived in an abundant world!
Updated: 14th April 2023.
Essi Koski-Lammi
Essi Koski-Lammi is an Interior Designer, Intuitive Healer, and Inner Alignment Coach with over 20 years of experience in energy work. She guides purpose-driven women and businesses to reconnect with their authentic essence through inner alignment coaching, strategic business channeling, and conscious interior design. Essi’s mission is to create harmony and beauty in both inner and outer spaces, allowing clarity, success, and well-being to flow naturally.
